A Picture Can Make A Difference
As an introvert with an extreme level of trust issues, it was difficult for Ahmad to express his frustration over a couple of “bad days”. An expert in the art of faking his emotions according to the situation, he bluffed most of his friends with an ever-lasting smile, constant chattering, and habit of cracking “Thandi juggtain”. However, like most people, Ahmad preferred to remain silent and suffer without letting anyone share the pain. Once his Macroeconomics class was over around 10 a.m., rather than going along with his friends to PDC for their breakfast (which was his routine), he casually lied to them by claiming that PhotoLUMS had asked him to complete some tasks before eleven in the morning, so he had to rush. While they did express their disapproval for Ahmad’s decision to bail out of their breakfast plan, especially Mahnoor who was hoping to share an ‘aalu paratha’ with him, they were well aware that societies are fairly rigid when it comes to meeting deadlines and wished him luck for his tasks. “See you all soon”, said Ahmed as he enthusiastically waved at them with a gigantic smile.
The expressions expressed by Ahmad changed altogether when he turned his back towards his friends. His attractive smile turned into a scowl, shoulders dropped, the person radiating happiness looked as if he needed someone to hug him and inspire his lost soul with renewed hope. The person who was renowned for his fast-paced walk, intentionally allowed people to walk past him as he was only slowing them down. Slowly but surely, he dragged his feet across the Admin block, the weight of his legs demanding him to put in extra effort for every step he took. His destination, the first floor of the library. A journey that you would hardly expect him to take five minutes, lasted for more than half an hour with Ahmad intentionally stopping, questioning whether it was a good decision or not.
Once he found a lonely spot in the library with a vacant table, it was time to commence the mission that forced him to lie and avoid his favorite breakfast plan. He placed his bag on the table, opening the zip before remembering the reason why his mother brought him a smiley emoji bag tie. “For a person with a radiant smile like yours, even your bag needs to smile and spread positivity at those coming behind you”, were the words his mother said when she came across it at HKB. Such flashbacks at a time when you are already upset, only tend to increase your emotional instability as now he decided to face the sober view of life. He took out his secretly hidden, daily journal and began to scribble. For a person with reservations on the prospect of ranting with people who come and go in life, he was habitual of inking the pages of his journal to express his anger and frustration. Out of nowhere, one of his friends with whom he was meant to be with on the breakfast entered the library.
Fearful that she may realize that Ahmad lied, he started to speculate a conversation where he practiced all the possible questions he may have to face. He saw his friend Mahnoor move to and fro in the library, looking for an ideal spot to sit. Hoping against hope that she doesn’t come and sit next to him, Ahmad placed his bag on the seat right next to him, pretending that it was not vacant. Well, that quickly backfired as she spotted Ahmad and recognized his bag, asking him to move it aside so she can sit on the seat. She casually sat and didn’t even ask a word regarding the fact that Ahmad was meant to be somewhere else. Taking out a course pack form her bag, she began reading a chapter on ‘class structure’, unbothered with what Ahmad was doing. Taking a sigh of relief, Ahmad continued writing his journal. Minutes passed until he realized the person next to him was closely observing him.
“Kya Hua? You look off today?” she abruptly asked. Caught off guard, Ahmad unconvincingly said, “Yeah I am fine. Just writing my daily journal”. The tone with which Ahmad replied was a perfect indicator that something was bothering him, thus Mahnoor further inquired, “What are you writing about? Anything interesting?” Well, the hesitation with which Ahmad replied was the last criterion as Mahnoor comprehended that his friend was having a bad day. Despite having a quiz in the afternoon, she closed her book and just sat there, regularly beginning conversations about her, reminding him of some of the good times they recently shared, provoking the gloomy side of Ahmad to let out a peal of odd laughter.
However, the downhearted lad soon got flashbacks of what his problem was, paving way for emotional baggage to get the better of him as he rudely asked Mahnoor to let him continue writing his journal while reminding her that she also had a quiz in the evening. Despite trying his best to note down the condensed thoughts inside his head, a part of him was eager to see what Mahnoor will do now? She shifted her focus on the book, reading one page after another, discouraging the small part inside Ahmad’s head which believed she was the key in dragging him out of the overthinking burden he had a hobby of carrying. Ten minutes later, he heard a hushed click of a camera- the one you hear when your mobile is on vibration mode and you take a picture. This was helped by the fact that the library had a “NO NOISE” policy. Ahmad’s heart was eager to see who the photographer was and what was in the photograph but his brain reminded him that he needs to act subtly without revealing the fact that he was peaking. Turns out, Mahnoor had taken a photograph of Ahmad and saved it in a WhatsApp group where she was the sole member with the caption “Monday, Ahmad looks sad….must help”.
The sixth sense of Ahmad was bulging out in happiness, endorphins released throughout his body, within seconds the whole mood of feeling dejected and useless were replaced with renewed hope and thought that maybe he isn’t the unloved, unnecessary and low-esteemed person he once imagined. Mahnoor stayed with Ahmad for the next two hours in the library, just sitting alongside him as both of them carried out their tasks. Overwhelmed with the moral support of Mahnoor, Ahmad decided to treat her with a deal from McDonald’s which he ordered via Food Panda. With the notification that the rider is waiting on the gate, Ahmad left the library with his bag to receive his order, walking towards the gate. On his return to the library, he couldn’t find Mahnoor anywhere at all. Reluctantly, he asked the librarian who explained that she had left immediately after Ahmad went away from the library. Since there was an extra burger that was meant for her, Ahmad called her only to find out she was sleepy and left for her room once he left.
While Mahnoor did not do something extravagant for Ahmad, this very incident proved to be a major morale booster for the disheartened lad who refused to talk out of his problems. All she did was sit with him during his tough time, signaling him that she’s here in case Ahmad needed someone to talk to. She did not force or compel Ahmad to spill the beans behind his uncharacteristic behavior or give a justification for his lie about being on a job designated by PhotoLUMS.
In life, you will come across situations that aren’t going to be in your comfort zone with stress taking a toll on not only your mental health but also personality. Despite your unique quality of faking and mending your personality according to the different personalities and situations you come across, there are always people who notice the minor changes in the way you act and are there to stand beside you, willing to weather the storm. While the journey to find such people may not be an easy one, one day you will release that you have found the diamond out of the rough. And since all of us are humans, imperfect, there is no shame in admitting your faults and mistakes as adopting an egoistic approach in friendships only poison the beautiful bond. Obviously, people carry some secrets from their past, finessing their way through life, it is important to treat people the way they are to you instead of letting mistakes from the past cloud your judgment regarding them. The day you realize you don’t owe someone a right to closure and vice versa, your life will change for the better as the minor petty things do not void your friendship. If you had a very dear friend who may be nothing more than an acquaintance now, it is important to hold onto the golden memories you shared rather than carrying a vendetta or clinging onto a broken friendship with one-sided efforts, undermining your self-respect.
I hope you all find the right people who make you feel special and you hold onto them!
