FRIENDS
This has nothing to do with the over-hyped series where one good actor carries the rest
Blood relations, we cannot select them and neither does our will change the destined outcomes, but when there is another unique relationship on which we have complete control. That relation brings a new meaning to our life, one filled with adventure, care, closure, opening a new dimension to our everyday experiences. Yes, I am referring to the beautiful bond of “friendship”. While our parents, siblings, and grandparents shower immense love and support, being our pillar of strength during the highs and lows of life, the fact is that our whole life does not revolve solely on them (not taking any credit away from them as they are AMAZING!). We all have our purpose and goals in life, sometimes those where your family members can’t accompany you. Then, you experience emptiness and loneliness, further aggravated by your distancing from family. It might be a sweeping statement but I don’t think any journey whatsoever is interesting if you are alone at it. To cater to this void in life, we generally, maybe greedily, tend to make friends outside our family boundaries as that makes all life activities enjoyable.
We all connect with people in different ways and usually tend to seek similarities before deciding whom to induce in our little bubble of life. Well, I am not one of them at all as all of my closest friendships began with the most irrational beginnings. Be it squaring up a person in a fistfight at school, mocking someone as your class hated the attention the guy had from the opposite gender, or maybe intentionally ignoring someone as you assumed she’s a spoilt brat with attitude issues, all these people ended up becoming very good friends eventually.
Similarly, sport plays a pivotal role in forging bonds of friendships. There exists friendly competitiveness on the field where you get to experience the real personalities of people and the mutual love for a particular sport leads to something special. Even today, if I end up talking to 10 people daily, out of those, 9 would be those whom I met on the field or fancied facing them in a competitive match. Be it football where a friend repeated on me what Modric did to Gomes in the El Classico, cricket where the over-sized shoes of a friend led to the most hilarious dismissal, or the table tennis matches where we partners kept arguing with one another as the opposition scratched their heads in amazement. These memories may be deemed irrelevant by most but, hoping you watched INSIDE OUT, these events translated into “CORE MEMORIES” and have a special place in my heart.
Being a day-scholar with friends who resided in the dorms, I have seen the growth in most of my friends, mainly owing to the independence they honed from being away from their homes. They may be away from their immediate family, but they forged family-like friendships with a small group and looked after one another. Studying together, staying together, nurturing interest together, adjusting to conflicts with each other, and helping each other further solidified their bond of friendship.
As my dad says, “If you are surrounded with people who keep on praising you and claiming everything is fine, they aren’t your well-wishers”, a real friend does not shy away from highlighting your mistakes in hope that you get over them and further improve yourself. Their influence in your life acts as a make or break as the company of honest and good-natured friends elevate you to the level needed to realize your potential. Moreover, even though they might show sloppiness at times but the fact is that we can easily discuss and share such issues and thoughts with our friends which we cannot share with our parents. Discussing professional and personal stress with our friends makes us feel relaxed. Whenever I feel hard-done-by the various societies I am a part of, I bombard a couple of friends with countless texts telling them why the society sucks, which eventually helps me get over my dejected phase. They are our mental support and when we are in crisis, a good friend joins hand and helps in solving the problem.
In these modern times, mainly owing to the nuclear family structure of the existing society, people mostly stay alone and tend to rely on friends for hanging out and exploring the globe while enjoying their hobbies together. Would it be wrong to suggest they eliminate boredom and loneliness from our lives? Add color to our life? Act like the big support we all needed?
On the contrary, blame me for acting as the devil’s advocate but remember that not all friends are meant to stay for life. Nothing’s permanent in this life and we may end up bidding farewell to someone whom we considered a potent part of our existence despite my friend’s persistence that we would be eating Chicken Jalfaraizi at Gourmet Grill when we’re 50. The important part is to owe that phase of life and move on regardless of the emotional baggage of the past. Even I had to eliminate some people from my life, with several issues unresolved, unanswered questions, yet that did not break me from the core. I did not stop eating, showering, studying, or even shit-posting on my Facebook profile. The heart was slightly saddened with the loss but eventually realized no one costs more than your mental peace and if you come at a phase where you have to convince someone to stay, you should know they have already left you. So while you live, cheer and celebrate with them, if they do leave at a point, show some grace and leave at the right note rather than poisoning the relation to such an extent that when you recall their existence, foul words greet them rather than the countless memories you cherished together.
In our lifetime, we choose our friends. The journey of life becomes memorable because of friends. Friendship is a lovely relation without which life seems dull. It is the relationship with our friends that teaches us to share, love, care, and most importantly helps us to fight odds and be successful. Having a true friend acts as a boon. Friends increase the sense of belongingness and generate a feel-good factor. We all thrive and look for at least one that friend who at times criticizes and appreciates too. Emotional and psychological attachments are important and can only be experienced with friends.
